Farmer Jones searched tirelessly for the wedding ring that his wife accidentally dropped in the horse's feed bag the day before.

Posted by: Gary at 11:36 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Is this real, I wonder?

h/t: Ace

Posted by: Gary at 12:04 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Sent via email from my older brother (no, that's not him in the picture).

Posted by: Gary at 09:03 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Reuters has finally captured evidence that the President does, in fact, go to the bathroom - despite speculation that he has a magic digestive system controlled by Karl Rove!

WTF is this all about? I mean, it would at least be somewhat interesting if he had written: "Condi, cover for me. I have to go heave a Havana!" or something crude like that.

But this makes the Reuters wire?

Posted by: Gary at 10:18 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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What follows is a transcript of a scene that didn't make it into the Extended Edition of Peter Jackson's "The Two Towers", reproduced in full.

Sam?

Yes Mr. Frodo?

Why do you keep looking at me like that?

Like what, Mr. Frodo?

Posted by: Gary at 10:14 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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1 Wonder why this didn't make it into the extended edition? Damn conservatives! :wink:

Posted by: Wordsmith from Nantucket at September 13, 2005 01:31 PM (nrGCx)

2 LOL.

Posted by: NYgirl at September 13, 2005 07:57 PM (JEAUq)

3 I'm not a "Tolkien Geek" by any stretch, but I think those guys were hot for Gandalf. Didya see the way they were all jumping on the bed at the end, all grinning like fools, saying "GANDALF" all dopey. No, no, no...I'll take Star Wars any day!

Posted by: GroovyVic at September 14, 2005 06:20 AM (DVnJg)

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Ace has outdone himself on this one. He channels the events on Capitol Hill next week during the Roberts hearings and reveals all. This already made my weekend.

Warning: Not exactly "familty friendly" material.

Posted by: Gary at 04:48 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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This is just too funny. Apparently for years now, some vertically-challenged actor has been claiming on his resume that he played on Oompa Loompa in the original "Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory". The 57-year old Ezzy Dame, however, was "outed" by an actor who really did play an Oompa Loompa named Rusty Goffe.

Dame later confessed to the ruse:

“I never intended to harm anyone or my community by this little white lie. It was a little white lie that became my haunted nightmare.”

h/t: The Museum of Hoaxes

Posted by: Gary at 01:35 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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1 On Saturday, Sept 24th of this year, RightMarch, Protest Warrior, Move America Forward,Free Republic will be Counter Protesting the left in our Nations Capitol. Answer Internatioal and ACLU lawyers will be at the event. We would love for youre group to join, as we a send a message to the left.. That they no longer own the street!!!

Posted by: cirque at September 02, 2005 03:22 PM (jHLMN)

2 this site sucks balls like oompaloompas!

Posted by: nichole at September 20, 2005 12:44 AM (J4a1o)

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I don't know about you but this would be more than enough to keep me away.

Posted by: Gary at 11:33 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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"Yeah, in WWII some crazy bitch used to camp outside Hyde Park and root for the Nazis. I put two bullets right between her eyes from 200 yards and I'm still a damn good shot, if you catch my meaning, Mr. President..."

See more good captions at Caption This!

Posted by: Gary at 02:21 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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