Why do some men feel it's necessary to walk up to a urinal and pull their pants and underwear down just to take a pee?

Dudes, pants have these things called zippers. Their purpose is allow access for ol' one-eye to the urinal. Granted it's a little easier if you wear boxers but if you can't figure out how to move aside the flaps on a pair of briefs to let your meat-puppet see the light of day maybe it's time to change your style of underwear.

There is nothing more annoying in a men's room (outside of stupid conversation) than to have some guy walk up beside you and go through the trouble of unbuckling his belt, unsnapping his snap (or unbuttoning his button), unzipping his fly, untucking his shirt and yanking the whole works down to his knees just to take a whiz! Is he afraid of actually touching it? Maybe he figures then he won't have to bother washing his hands. But that's a whole other topic.

C'mon fellas. You've had the equipment for decades now. Learn how be more efficient with it, will ya? Sheesh!

Posted by: Gary at 11:30 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
Post contains 197 words, total size 1 kb.

1 It's a good thing we live on opposite sides of the country then, and you won't ever have the honor of standing next to me at the group urinal. I don't, however, pull my pants down to my knees (maybe when I was 4). I think it's quicker to unbuckle and unsnap. Fiddling around with the flaps is more work. What I don't get is the backdoor flap. I suppose those were only put on longjohn one-piece suits, where you couldn't simply pull your pants down, since it was attached to your shirt. I wonder if that's how the front flap originated as well? By the way...I spend a good 20-30 seconds just shaking the last drip off of my hose. I don't like having stains on my undies. Even the front end. If there is toilet tissue on hand, I'll use that to dab. Just thought you'd like to have the not enough information about me, Gary.

Posted by: Wordsmith at February 13, 2006 12:50 PM (nrGCx)

2 I'll bet you don't even leave a "buffer" urinal next to the other guy, do ya? Noooo, you probably just saunter right up the very next spot. Especially if they don't have one of those divider things in between. And you probably "courtesy flush" too! Am I right? The only odd thing I ever do at the urinal is complain about the tempurature of the water. So there!

Posted by: Gary at February 13, 2006 01:55 PM (PLHs9)

3 By the way... You should have stopped there -- way more information than we needed to know.

Posted by: rightwingprof at February 13, 2006 05:43 PM (/IE5Q)

4 Pretty funny! You should check out this Flash game. I was gonna do a post on it but figured I'd just comment with a direct link. http://flasharcade.com/urinal_game.html It epitomizes guy behavior in public toilets. .....Dan

Posted by: .....Dan at February 13, 2006 11:50 PM (604CD)

5 Weeeeeel...my son still does that, but he's six, so his he okay? He's learning, though, because he has "longjohn" style pajamas, and one morning he got up and said "Mommy! I'm using the pee-pee hole!" (Since we're sharing so much, here) But he won't touch it, is this weird? We keep telling him he can, it is his, he's in the bathroom, but he won't aim that gun!

Posted by: GroovyVic at February 14, 2006 06:10 AM (MHfik)

6 Wow. Such a stimulating conversation you've created here, Gary. When my brother was five-years old, he spontaneously decided that he needed a bandaid for the hole. I've kept that shelved away for two decades now, just waiting for my drunken toast at his wedding.

Posted by: Sadie at February 14, 2006 08:01 AM (cP0Aq)

7 I agree, I hate that. And BTW, I've always thought those flaps in briefs were useless. I wear boxers now, but back when I wore briefs it was always less trouble just to pull the whole elastic band down enough to whiz than to try to separate those ridiculous flaps in the front.

Posted by: Cynical Nation at February 14, 2006 12:26 PM (vC1jc)

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