Diane Lane admits: "I was the date from hell"...

Had to post about this one. My dream girl of the last twenty-five years, Diane Lane, recounted a dating story to the Ottawa Citizen while discussing her new film "Must Love Dogs". It's actually really funny.

Apparently she went to a concert with a blind date wearing a very tight leather skirt. So far, so good, huh? Well, after consuming a "Texas-sized drink" she had to relieve herself in the worst way, but the lines to the bathrooms were ridiculous. She couldn't hold it.

She had been carrying around a "huge bucket-sized container" all evening and figured maybe she could use that to save standing in line at the washroom.

"I asked the gentleman if he would allow me to go in [his] car and pull down the leather pants and go into that huge trough. Everything was fine until I had to pull the pants up -- and knocked the bucket over."

She wiped up the mess with the T-shirts she had purchased at the concert, but was terrified of telling her date what had happened.

"I never told him and I can only imagine what it smelled like the next day."

And she never heard from him again. Understandably.

Understandably? Hey, it's the guy's loss. I would've thought it was hilarious. And I should be so lucky to have my car smell like Diane Lane's pee.

Man, I really do have issues, don't I?

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Ours v. Theirs (Part Deux)...

Yesterday I posted a link to great composite comparing the looks of prominent Republican babes against prominent Democrat...er, uh...women, as posted on Grouchy Old Cripple.

Well, some little twerp emailed Denny with a challenge to compare their "accomplishments" and he did not disappoint. Check it out here.

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Moonbat Left Not Pleased With Hillary...

Lefty bloggers lost their minds yesterday (which is kind of redundant) when Hillary Clinton made an attempt to call for unity between the Uber-Liberal wing of the Democrat party and the "Only Slightly" Liberal wing (who go around calling themselves "centrists").

Long a revered figure by many in the party's liberal wing, Clinton (D-N.Y.) unexpectedly found herself under attack after calling Monday for a cease-fire among the party's quarreling factions and for agreeing to assume the leadership of a DLC-sponsored initiative aimed at developing a more positive policy agenda for the party.

The party's Bush-hating "activists" apparently aren't about to be quiet about this political kabuki-dance aimed at trying to fool voters about who they really are. Kos fired a shot across the bow of the Democratic Leadership Council's efforts to craft of more moderate image.

"If she wanted to give a speech to a centrist organization truly interested in bringing the various factions of the party together, she could've worked with NDN," the blog said in a reference to the New Democrat Network, with which Daily Kos's Markos Moulitsas is associated. "Instead, she plans on working with the DLC to come up with some common party message yadda yadda yadda. Well, that effort is dead on arrival. The DLC is not a credible vehicle for such an effort. Period."

The unofficial Civil War within the Democrat party has begun!

As Darth Sidious would say, "Excellent...Excellent!"

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Dem Pow-wow Appoints Hillary as Agenda Czar...

Meeting in Columbus, high-ranking Democrats called for a truce between the Left wing of the party and the so-called "centrists" and has asked Hillary Clinton to come up with defining a party agenda.

This is perfect. Now they're turning to Mrs. Clinton to teach them how to try and fool the American people into overlooking what they really are. That is, to say: Liberal Moonbats. They want to sign on to her "I'm not really a Left-winger" rehabilitation campaign, essentially giving her carte blanche to remake the party in the image that would most benefit her likely Presidential run in 2008.

Remember what happened the last time this party put their future in the hands of a Clinton? They lost the House, they lost the Senate, they lost State Houses and Legislatures and then, the Presidency. But here are Bill and Hill at the top of the heap, toes still tapping and calling the shots.

When are these folks gonna learn? Hopefully, never. And I'm sure the MoveOn.org crowd may have something to say about all this.

At this point, all they have is a litany of rants against George W. Bush, who by the way is not running in 2008, nor is his current Vice-President or anyone from his administration (I seriously doubt Condi will run). Bush really did do his party a favor by choosing a VP that wasn't going to run to succeed him. It allows the country to see a diverse group of people sharing and debating ideas to stand in contrast to the lock-step Liberalism of the Democrats. And it keeps the Dems guessing as to exactly who and what they will be trying to run against until late spring of 2008.

Where are their plans, their ideas, their vision? They can't really share those things with the American people because they run counter to anything the majority of the voters support. So it's back to playing "let's pretend" with Hillary.

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Ours v. Theirs...

I'll take the Republican Babe everytime, brought to you by Denny, The Grouchy Old Cripple.

H/T to Venomous Kate!

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Bolton to be U.N. rep the minute the Senate adjourns...

Though White House spokesman Scott McClellan is pulling a Sgt. Schultz, inside sources say that the announcement of a recess appointment of John Bolton as the U.S. representative to the United Nations will come moments after Senators get out of Dodge for the August recess.

Congressional aides said a recess appointment could be announced as early as Friday night, immediately after the Senate is scheduled to adjourn for the monthlong August break. A recess appointment would allow Bolton to take up the U.N. post but he would serve only until January 2007.

Good. Now let's get a posse together and go give Kofi Anan an atomic wedgie!

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It's up...it's GOOD!

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Giants sign first draft pick, three more to go...

This is an aspect of the NFL that I find truly distasteful. When a young kid drafted by a team gets pulled aside by a smooth-talking agent whose "negotiations" - designed primarily to line the agent's pockets - often keep the kid from reporting to training camp on time.

The good news is that since the NY Giants had only four picks this year (having traded away the 1st rounder to get Eli Manning - which WAS worth it), there will be fewer stragglers. 4th Rounder, HB Brandon Jacobs has signed with CB Corey Webster (2nd round), DE Justin Tuck (3rd round) and DE Eric Moore (6th round) still working it out with Giants management. For all the latest news, the best site to follow is Big Blue Interactive.

Camp starts Friday and dammit I want them all there. No BS! Get your pads on and your heads down and get to work. The team has a lot of reasons to be optimistic this season. It would be great if we could start off of the right fitting with a complete roster.

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More on the marginalization of (very) Old Labor...

The WSJ's OpinionJournal.com has an excellent analysis of yesterday's move by several large unions to break away from the AFL-CIO, creating two opposing forces trying to control the future direction of Big Labor:

"What's missing on both sides, however, is a vision of economic opportunity that might actually make workers want to join a union in the first place. Tactics aside, both factions continue to believe in the idea of unions that arose in the Industrial Age: Greedy management versus the exploited working man, seniority over flexibility, fixed benefits and strike threats over working with management to keep a U.S.-based company profitable and innovative in a world of growing competition. On the political front, both factions favor trade protection, higher taxes and government help to enforce restrictive work rules. This is the agenda of Old Europe, where jobless rates are above 10%, and it merely offers more economic insecurity in the U.S. as well.

What the labor movement really needs is a new generation of leaders who understand the emerging competition to U.S. workers from the likes of India and China. Rather than oppose imports to protect textile jobs that can't be saved, such leaders would work to reform education so future Americans can compete in the knowledge industries that will grow the fastest. They'd also work to make pensions and health insurance transportable from company to company, so a worker wouldn't be trapped by benefits in a job or industry he didn't like. They'd be partners with management, not antagonists."

As union leadership grows more out of touch with union membership, more and more workers are finding the attraction to these organizations to be nothing more than a dead end.

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Top Russian "Spammer" found murdered...

A dude in Russia who was notorious for sending spam emails to just about everyone in the country, was found dead in his apartment the cause of which is believed to be repeated blows to the head.

Wow. Now let that be warning to all you scumbags who bombard us with offers of low-rate refinancing and Cialis gel tabs. We are sick of it! And if we ever find you...

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Oh, Good God! Jane Fonda goes on "anti-war" tour...

And the Skipper at BMEWS is beside himself. Frankly, I don't blame him. Why doesn't this woman just go away?

While simultaneously humping her awful biography, Fonda will get re-acquainted with her pinko, America-hating inner bitch.

"I've decided I'm coming out," she said. Hundreds of people in the audience cheered loudly when Fonda announced her intentions to join the anti-Iraq war movement. "I have not taken a stand on any war since Vietnam," she said. "I carry a lot of baggage from that."

Here's an idea, Jane. Pack up all that baggage of yours and move to France. With movies like Monster-In-Law and The Electric Horseman on your resume, you could be the female Jerry Lewis. But wherever you go...just go away!

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Iraqi recruits defiantly line up to join new army...

Risk suicide attacks to sign up.

Abul Hatim, 38, who has five children, said: "We cannot rely on the US to secure our country. It is something we have to do ourselves."

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"No, you can have trophy back..."

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Han Solo in a mid-life crisis?

Turn 60, dump your wife of twenty years, wear an earring and hang out with a human stick figure in night clubs. Actor Harrison Ford has made few changes lately:

In a rare interview about his private life, Ford, now 63, told Saga magazine: "I am not the first man who wanted to make changes in his life at 60 and I won't be the last. It is just that others can do it with anonymity."

Asked if he was going through a severe mid-life crisis, he admitted: "A lot of people might be asking that."

Hey, leave the guy alone. It's his life, after all. And if he wants to be with Calista Flockhart - 23 years his junior - what the hell. I bet he had her at "I know".

My only question is why are we talking mid-life crisis here? Did the life expectancy age suddenly jump up to 126? Sounds more like an end-of-life crisis to me.

I mean, if they ever make another "Raiders" movie, Indiana Jones will be wearing a colostomy bag where his bull whip should be.

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Big Labor is cracking up...

Talk about rearranging deck chairs on a sinking ship. Several large unions, dissatisfied with the leadership of the AFL-CIO are dropping its membership.

The Service Employees International Union, with 1.8 million members, plans to announce Monday that it is leaving the AFL-CIO, said several labor officials who spoke on condition of anonymity because they are not authorized to discuss the developments.

The Teamsters union also was on the verge of disaffiliating, and would likely to be the first to follow SEIU's lead, the officials said. Two other boycotting unions were likely to leave the federation: United Food and Commercial Workers and UNITE HERE, a group of textile and hotel workers.

Union membership in the U.S. has dropped drastically from one in three private-sector workers fifty years ago to about 8% of the total private-sector labor force. And the unions think they can reverse this trend if they just "reorganize". Despite the scare tactics of the unions, the current U.S. unemployment rate is a mere 5.0% and there seem to be noticable absence of "Hoovervilles" out there.

I was raised in a union household and it seems to me that the unions should focus more of their resources on the legitimate interests of their members rather than protecting their own bureaucracy and wiring the bulk of their dues directly to the DNC.

UPDATE: 4:45pm
Captain Ed weighes in:

"That redirection of efforts means that less money will come to the Democrats. More importantly, it presents an opportunity for new national leadership to come to the fore for the labor movement. That leadership will not have the long-standing relationship to the Democrats that have sold labor and the unions to the Democrats for two generations. The Republicans have an opportunity to at least neutralize the Democratic hold on labor, if not swing a significant portion of it to the GOP.

Together with the new Republican inroads in the African-American community, this new refocusing of labor on organization and the split in the national movement means that the Democrats face the very real possibility that they will spend a generation in the minority."

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Cooter calls for boycott...

Actor and former GA Congressman Ben Jones, who played "Cooter Davenport" on the original Dukes of Hazzard TV series is calling for fans of the series to stay away from the film unless the creators "clean it up".

In an open letter to the fans of the show on his Web site, Jones says that "rather than honoring our legendary show, they have chosen to degrade it." He closes by saying that fans should send the producers a message that says, "If you don't clean it up, we're not going to see it." He adds, "Maybe a kick in their pocketbook will get their attention."

Is this guy serious? Legendary Show? And just try and tell me that most of the male viewership didn't tune in every Friday night at 9pm just to see how high Catherine Bach's cut-offs would be cut - straining to try and catch a peak at her "cooter". What a bunch of crap.

You know the real reason Jones doesn't want you to go see the movie? Cuz he's "cleaning up" himself off the old series. He's got a website that markets a whole bunch of "Dukes" merchandise, advertises his "Dukes" museum and organizes an annual fan get-together called "Dukesfest". The success of the current movie might make a dent in his potential profits from new fans who actually like the big-screen version.

On top of that, apparently Jones is a little pissed off that he can't get in on this gravy train as well.

You probably know that the creators of this film wanted absolutely nothing to do with the original members of the cast. Doesn't that seem strange to you, given how popular our show is right now, and how popular our cast still is? After all, our huge success for so many years is the reason they are making the film, and the film, after all, is about us.

Umm, it didn't have anything to do with the fact that the original cast is old enough to be grandparents now, would it? What a narcissistic jack-ass. Hey, Cooter, life went on after they cancelled the show. And trust me, no one's going to plop down ten bucks to see a Dukes reunion with you old geezers.

Reminds me of when Tim Burton was making "Batman" and Adam West got all bent out shape because they weren't casting him in the lead.

Hey, I don't have a problem with the guy earning a buck or two off the old show. This is America, baby and if he can bleed the thing for all it's worth more power to him. But for crissakes get off your freakin' high horse. The show was OK. It wasn't exactly classic television. And it was not what I would consider a "family show".

I don't know about the current movie. I do know that Johnny Knoxville and Seann William Scott are funny SOB's. Whether or not they can make a rehashed concept like this entertaining is up to the audience. And if the film's creators were to "clean it up" they'd be taking away all incentive for its target audience to pay money to see it. It'll succeed or fail on its own merits. And I seriously doubt anyone is going to base their decision to go on what Ben Jones has to say.

In fact, I might go out and see it just to bust this asshat's balls.

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Nominee fight: over before it even began...

Drudge is reporting that Hillary will support John Roberts for the Supreme Court. Oh sure, Chucky Schumer and Teddy Kennedy will get in their grilling and Moron.Org will no doubt run a few ads but for all intents and purposes there will be no real "showdown" during Roberts' confirmation hearings.

Writes Drudge's source:

"Look, we're not thrilled President Bush is in office and gets to make these choices," said a top Hillary source, "but we have to make the best of the situation until the next election!"

Translation: We're not happy about it, but we're not stupid. Camp Hillary recognizes the folly of attacking Roberts because there is nothing to argue against on his merits. Just like any other political fight, if Hillary doesn't think she can win, she stays out of it. Wouldn't surprise me if Joe Biden and other prominent Dems follow suit.

They were really caught flat-footed on this one. They'll keep their powder dry for the next nomination.

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Join the Jihad!

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Holy Crap! A Hollywood Actress Who "Gets it"...

My jaw almost dropped when I read this one (courtesty of the Ace of Spades) but actress Scarlett Johansson seems to understand what so many "stars" do not. We pay good (hard-earned, that is) money to be entertained. We don't need to be preached at.

The quote:

"I don't believe movies should deliver messages," says Scarlett Johansson. "After you've paid 10 bucks to see it — 15 bucks with popcorn — you just want to be entertained."

Yes...YES! Exactly! I do NOT care if an actor/actress is the looniest Left-wing moonbat in their private lives. But please, please, please don't shove your opinions in my face just because some dumbass journalist is recording it or writing it down. Maybe Ms. Johansson noticed the reaction to Maggie Glynenhennde...Glynahilla...
Glendynhallen...Maggie the actress's dopey statements and wised up.

Look, I think I speak for a lot of Americans when we say "please entertain (i.e. do your job) us, don't talk down to us". I know it's hard when you have an entourage following you around, kissing your ass and telling you you're the greatest actor since Spencer Tracy but for God's sake - reign in the ego.

You know what? I'm more likely to pay hard-earned bucks to see Scarlett Johansson. She's either smart because she understands the consequences of pissing off her audience or really smart because she does "get it".

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"It's just a flesh wound..."

Like the Black Knight who just had his arm sheared off in Monty Python's "Holy Grail", Paul Krugman looks at the recent news of rising government revenues from lower tax rates and arrogantly dismisses it as nothing, really. Krugman, whose Liberal perspective is challenged by these results, says that "this revenue boost looks like a temporary blip," which "probably reflects mainly capital gains on stocks and real estate, together with bonuses paid in the finance and real estate industries." M'kay.

Alan Reynolds of the Cato Institute writes about Krugman's "analysis" this morning in the Washington Times:

Mr. Krugman's theory that executive bonuses in finance and real estate could account for much of the $66 billion is politically correct but mathematically impossible. Top executives in the top financial firms received average bonuses of $2 million a year in 2004, according to Mercer consulting. But only the increase in such bonuses could account for increased tax collections. Even if 100 executives received an extra $300,000 apiece, that would lift the nation's taxable income by only $30 million. And a 35 percent tax on that sum would amount to only $10.5 million, which can't begin to explain a $66 billion revenue gain.

Lacking any explanations, Mr. Krugman gets personal. "The usual suspects on the right," he writes, "are already declaring victory over the deficit, and proclaiming vindication for the Laffer Curve -- the claim that tax cuts pay for themselves because they have such a miraculous effect on the economy."

I have not declared victory over the deficit because doing so would amount to declaring I'm content that federal spending has grown from 18.4 percent of GDP in 2000 to 20.2 percent, accounting for 69 percent of the deficit.

Meanwhile, revenues are already back up to at least 17.4 percent of GDP -- virtually the same as the 17.6 percent figure in 1993, after President Clinton greatly increased tax rates on upper incomes, gasoline and Social Security benefits.

Liberal economists like Paul Krugman desperately try to find ways to explain away the proof of supply-side theory and the Laffer curve now matter how many times it's proven right. To admit that lower tax rates encourage investment and economic growth thereby leading to higher tax receipts blows away their whole Keynesian philosophy of big government = economic growth. And it would awaken them from the dream of a socialist fantasyland that exists only in their own minds.

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