December 08, 2006

Buck "Frogers" In The 21st Century

I couldn't resist that one for this week's Friday WTF?.

A tree frog has miraculously come back to life after being accidentally frozen solid in a freezer in Australia.

The tiny frog was found covered in a layer of ice in a walk-in freezer - at -18C - at a Darwin cafeteria.

But - after defrosting - it fully recovered and started breathing again, reports the Australian Daily Telegraph.

Amazing.

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November 21, 2006

How's This For A Conversation Piece?

Imagine this in the center of your Thanksgiving table:

furniture.jpg

This is from a Dutch carpenter whose work is on display in an art gallery in Germany.

Cabinet maker Mario Philippona designed a range of stylish wooden cupboards, wardrobes and tables using the female anatomy as his inspiration.

His newest piece is a fruit bowl decorated with realistically shaped life-size wooden breasts called 'TittyFruity'.

Other pieces include a wine-glass cupboard in the shape of a pair of large breasts, a table supported by legs moulded from a female model and a bedside drawer which opens by pressing a button in the piece's 'vagina'.

Philippona said: "The shape of a woman, her organic architecture, combined with my passion for wood inspired me to sculpt these sexy designs."

I can hear dear old Uncle Gus as he passes the cranberry sauce, "Just look at them sweet potaters! Haw, Haw, Haw!"

At least it gives us guys a little reminder of what to be thankful for. :-)

OK, it's a slow news week...

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November 20, 2006

Happy Monday!

Heres Brucie.jpg

Yeah, sometimes you're the cute little Cape Fur seal, sometimes you're the giant razor-toothed man-eating Great White shark.

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November 17, 2006

Star Wars Geeks Demand Recognition From UN

Apparently, "Jedi" is the fourth largest religion in the UK.

OK, did I just write that? The fourth freaking largest religion in the United Kingdom!!!! Are you kidding me? No, I guess they're not.

‘We therefore are calling upon the United Nations Association to change November 16 to the UN Interstellar Day of Tolerance, to reflect the religious make-up of our twenty-first century civilisation.

‘Tolerance is about respecting difference where ever it lies, including other galaxies. Please don't exclude us from your important work. May the Force be with you.’

In the 2001 UK Census 390,000 people listed their religion as Jedi Knight making it the fourth biggest belief in the country.

There are also an estimated 70,000 Jedi knights in Australia, 53,000 in New Zealand and 20,000 in Canada.

WTF? They want to insert the word "interstellar" into the already utopian designation of "UN Day of Tolerance". This is political correctness at its most outrageous.

Look, I'll spot them the religion angle, but by what rationale do they come up with "interstellar". They're from THIS planet. Living in your parents' basement doesn't qualify as interstellar no matter how you have it decorated. The Star Wars Universe is not real. There are no Wookies, no Twi'leks, no Bothans, no Jawas...

Well, OK there are Jawas. Sorry 'bout that, Rusty.

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November 10, 2006

It's The End Of The World As We Know It

Jack Palance has died. Doogie Howser is gay. Add that to the Democrat takeover of Congress and you have the three remaining signs of the Apocalypse.

We are now officially f'ed.

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October 05, 2006

Speechless

Someone emailed this to me.

I have no idea what to make of it.

But I can't stop watching it.

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September 29, 2006

Woman Spoons Her Way To Health...With Sand

Here's a Friday WTF? for the hall of fame: Woman Eats Sand To Stay Healthy.

An Indian grandmother has revealed she eats a kilo of sand a day to stay fit and healthy.

Ram Rati, 80, considers sand an essential part of her daily diet and eats a kilo of it before breakfast, lunch and afternoon tea

Ram who lives in Chinhar in Lucknow told Asian News International: "When young, I tried it for fun once. Since then, I am used to it. My brothers and relatives pestered me to quit it but it was all in vain. I eat on an average around one or one-and-a-half kilos of sand per day."

Her granddaughter Shikha said: "The doctor said if she has no health problems, let her eat. We think it suits her health."

Talk about your dietary fiber. I'd say this woman could probably pass just about anything through her system at this point.

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September 15, 2006

I Told The Witchdoctor I Was In Love With You - It's "Friday WTF?"

Apparently "Ooh Eee, Ooh Ah-Ah, Tee-Tang Walla-Walla Bing Bang" must translate roughly to: Have sex with a hedgehog:

A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after he had sex with a hedgehog on a witchdoctor's advice.

Zoran Nikolovic, 35, from Belgrade, says the witchdoctor told him it would cure his premature ejaculation.

But he ended up in an operating theatre after the hedgehog's needles left his penis severely lacerated.

A hospital spokesman said: "The animal was apparently unhurt and the patient came off much worse from the encounter. We have managed to repair the damage to his penis."

I'm not going to touch that one with a ten foot...er...pole.

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September 13, 2006

Tonya Harding Redux?

Backup punter accused of stabbing starter in the leg.

Talk about a competitive environment! Why?!?!?!! Why?!?!?!?! Why?!?!?!?!?

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September 06, 2006

Oh, For The Love Of God!

You see this?

suris poop.jpg

Yes, it's a sculpture of the first turd squeezed out by the spawn of TomKat!

Here's the caption to this A/P gem:

This photo released by the Capla Kesting Gallery in August 2006 shows a sculpture purportedly cast from 19-week old Suri Cruise's first bowel movement. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes finally put Hollywood at ease by publishing the first photo of their daughter Suri, four months after her birth, in Vanity Fair magazine's October issue.
I don't know about you but this doesn't put me at ease. Not in the least! It freaking creeps me out!

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August 11, 2006

This Got My Goat!

Ace of Spades HQ brought this to the attention of the blogosphere a few days ago:


;font-family:sans-serif;">Iraq Still Manages to Shock

Listen to this story... by John Hendren

Morning Edition, August 7, 2006 · Sectarian strife continues to worsen in the Iraqi capital of Baghdad.

...the killing in Iraq is getting: shepherds in the rural western Baghdad neighborhood of Gazalea have recently been murdered, according to locals, for failing to diaper their goats....

Yes, you read that right. According to the audio:

The sexual tension is apparently so high in regions where sheiks take a draconian view of Sharia Law, that they feel the sight of naked goats poses an unacceptable temptation. They blame the goats.
Not only that, but at a grocery store in east Baghdad, the grocer and 3 others were shot to death and the grocery store firebombed because the grocer had "suggestively arranged his vegetables".

Have I mentioned how much I love my country, lately? Not that we don't get our own "news of the weird" over here...but, God bless America and our *ahem* liberal attitudes and acceptance of naked goats and erotic vegetables!


viagraveggiesd.jpg


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July 26, 2006

Innocent Man Killed Riding Roller Coaster In Bush's Garden!

I see a cover-up here:

A 52-year-old man who complained that he felt sick after riding a roller coaster at Busch Gardens died about two hours later in a hospital, park officials said Tuesday.
When the President was asked about the story, he is reported to have said, "I don't anything about that."

BUSH LIED!!! BUSH LIED!!!

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July 21, 2006

Now That's Some Nice Wool - It's Friday WTF?

Polish grannies are putting their crocheting skills to a new use - making G strings!

No longer able to sell their hand-crafted doilies and table clothes, women in the tiny Polish mountain village of Koniakow turned their crocheting skills to making sexy lingerie.

And the business has proved such a success that the crochetiers have now launched an online shop for people around the world to buy the knitted underwear.

Tadeusz Rucki, who funds the granny g-string firm, said: "People aren't only mad about g-strings in traditional white crochet, but also in red and black."

But the head of the local Society for Folk Art, Helena Kamieniarz, is not happy with the new business, saying: "What is being done to our old traditions is a disgrace. The art of crochet is not intended for making such garments."

crochet.jpg

What would my dear old Nanna say?

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July 20, 2006

When A Hard Good Man Is Good Hard To Find

There's always mother nature to answer the call of the wild:

sporting wood.jpg

Now that's what I call sporting wood.

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July 19, 2006

Interesting Photo Of The Day

tanner.jpg

The caption to this Reuters pic reads:

"Athlete Kathy Brennan (R) of Washington, D.C., helps to apply tanner on Forrest of Ferndale, Michigan, before the Physique competition during Gay Games VII in Evanston, Illinois, July 18, 2006."

Umm. I think somebody needs to explain to Ms. Brennan that applying the tanner internally amounts to overkill.

h/t: Neale News

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July 17, 2006

There's Only Two Things I Hate In This World...

"...People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. And the Dutch."

- Nigel Powers, 2002

Seriously, though. Apparently, there is a political party in the Netherlands dedicated to the passage of a law that lowers the age of sexual consent from 16 to 12.

12!!!!! Ferchrissakes!!!

A judge recently overturned a ban on this "political party" which is headed up by some pervert who molested an 11-year old boy. It's called the PNVD party (an acronym for "Brotherly Love, Freedom and Diversity" - yech). This is really nothing more than an out-and-about version of the Super Adventure Club from South Park.

The judge's rationale was that it was up to the voters to decide the appeal of such a group. Fine, I agree in principle. But hear me now and believe me later; if this group of sickos gets more than 2% of the vote in the next Dutch election, I am taking old Nigel's declaration to heart.

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July 05, 2006

Just How "Gay" Is Soccer?

Just head on over to AgentBedHead.com.

Warning: Not for the faint-hearted. We're talking muy "en fuego" here.

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June 29, 2006

Spit Or Swallow?

OK, you get your "Friday WTF?" story early (mostly because I'm going to be unconnected to the 'net tomorrow).

Here's a doozy. A guy in Poland gets pulled over for DUI, reeking of vodka. What is his defense?

A Polish former MP has escaped a drink driving ban after telling cops he had only been using vodka as mouth wash.

Grzegorz Gruszka was arrested after being pulled over by police in a routine check and failing a breath test.

He was acquitted after he told prosecutors he had not actually swallowed any alcohol, and had only rinsed his mouth with "jogobelka" - a popular local mixture of vodka and mustard.

Call me cynical but I think the fact that he was an ex-member of Parliament might have had a little something to do with this. But still, is this a Polish politician's version of "I didn't inhale"?

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June 27, 2006

Did A Dingo Take Your Baby?

You've got to love the unbelievable variety of unique animals that roam the Australian countryside.

I mean, just look at the choppers on this puppy:

dingo.jpg

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June 09, 2006

The Dead Chihuahua Sketch

Remember the Monty Python "Dead Parrot" Sketch? The one where John Cleese pounds the stiff deceased bird on the pet shop counter? "Hello Polly!!!!! Wakey, Wakey!!!! I've got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you!"

dead_parrot.jpg

Well here's story almost as funny but it's true. A woman in Missouri attacked a dog breeder with a stiff deceased dog!

"A woman angry that her new puppy had died pushed her way into a dog breeder's home and repeatedly hit her on the head with the dead Chihuahua, authorities said.

The 33-year-old woman told police she had taken the puppy to a veterinarian, who said it was only 4 weeks old and needed to be returned to its mother. But before she could return the puppy, it died.

Early Wednesday, the woman went to the breeder's home, pushed her way inside and began fighting with the breeder as she tried to make her way to the basement to get another puppy, police said.

The breeder wrestled the woman out of her house to the front porch, where the woman then hit the breeder over the head numerous times with the dead puppy, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported, citing police.

As the woman drove away, she waved the dead puppy out of the car's sunroof and yelled threats at the breeder, police said. She later called the breeder and threatened her and her family, according to court records."

Well this one definitely qualifies for my weekly Friday WTF? award.

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